Banging my own Drum.

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Rain! Lovely rain!

Well, good for the garden, which was as dry as a bone,

but not so go for those who have just rushed off on holiday.

So, what have we all been up to on days like this?

Hazel has set up camp in the greenhouse. Having reached the 'ripe old' age of 102, she thought she might as well 'ripen off' with the tomatoes!

Wes, on the other hand, decided on the doormat.

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So two dry pussies, and where was I?

In the 'workshop'.

Actually, us engineers are not supposed to use the word 'workshop', it has to be referred to as a 'Hobby room'! A workshop implies 'work' and that would never do in a residential property.

Elf 'n Safety and worse!!!!!

(Heaven help us - please eu hurry up and collapse)

You see, I'm one, who has always fancied a nice bang,

on the drum!

And my wee organ doesn't have one.

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This fellow over in Holland does.

A nice little side drum.

Here's another tucked behind a curtain,

showing all 'the works'.

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Now, to get these to bang at the right time,

and in time with the music, they can be linked into

the Bass Notes.

(as in the Ump, of ump, pah, pah.)

But, they can also be driven by a puff of air

from the tracker-bar.

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This is my tracker-bar.

The organ has 26 notes - but the bar has 27 holes!

You see I planned ahead and added an extra hole

for percussion.

Many builders do this.

My friend Derek (in Australia) has a 27th hole and

uses it to power his moving bandsmen.

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Derek Deane's 27 note Organ.

Over the years, at car boots and in charity shops,

I have picked up all sorts of rubbish,

and I have a few old tambourines,

and even an old drum kicking about.

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All I need now, is to get the puff of air,

from the hole number 27,

down to a device to bang the drum in time with the music!

So now to the technical bit.

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This is what I have been up to

whilst the rain, rained,

the euro collapsed,

and

the cats slept through the whole thing!

Making a valve chest to 'Bang on my Drum'.

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I must admit, that that the thought

of the euro collapsing,

and

the whole eu thingie going belly up,

is a darn sight more exciting

than having a bang on my drum!

I feel like playing "Land of Hope & Glory".

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In the Hands of a Few.

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I know this election covers the whole UK but......as an Englishman.....

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Smile at us, pay us, pass us; but do not quite forget,

For we are the people of England, that never has spoken yet.

There is many a fat farmer that drinks less cheerfully,

There is many a free French peasant

who is richer and sadder than we.

There are no folk in the whole world so hapless or so wise.

There is hunger in our bellies, there is laughter in our eyes;

You laugh at us and love us, both mugs and eyes are wet:

Only you do not know us. For we have not spoken yet.

G.K Chesterton

It has just gone 7 o'clock and the polls are open.

I shall be going down later in the day, a futile but necessary gesture.

You see here in the Beaconsfield constituency, one person does not really have one vote.

They have the equivalent of 0.029 votes.

This figure is based on the probability of the seat changing hands and its size.

(You can run your own test here)

45.91% of those who voted in Beaconsfield in 2005, did not vote for the winning candidate. Those votes counted for nothing in our First Past the Post system.

Across the country, the average UK voter has the power of 0.253 votes. That is 8.33 times more power than my vote here.

The future of the country is in the hands of a few - lucky enough to live in marginal seats.

They call this Democracy.

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Grow Your Own

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A well know Dittie by Q. Kumber

I was reading yesterday about how the flight ban was affecting supplies of fresh fruit and vegetables. True, a great deal of tropical fruit, bananas, oranges and grapefruit will have to be imported by sea and air, but surely not so for popular vegetables like potatoes, carrots and beans.

The sad fact is, this country does import potatoes from Egypt, carrots from Holland and beans from Kenya. Just think of the air-miles and additional cost.

When we were isolated and stood alone during World War II, everywhere you looked there were allotments, fields and even parks cultivated and producing fresh and healthy fruit and vegetables. “Dig for Victory” was the call.

I still have some of those leaflets - they were tucked away in my mother’s old cookbook.

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After the war things were very slow to improve and my father had an allotment in addition to the back garden. Plants that needed lots of watering, like lettuce and tomatoes were grown at home, and potatoes, cabbage and carrots were in long rows up at the allotment.

How do I remember all this?

Because Dad got me to help.

Whether I managed to help or just got in the way I know not! - but I do remember climbing into a huge wheelbarrow (which he had build) and being pushed up to the allotment.

I remember this large shed where gardeners could keep their tools, seeds and fertilizers - and I can still remember that wonderful ‘earthy’ smell that it contained.

Dried chicken manure no doubt, and things like “Blood, fish and bone”.

This was usually early on Sundays mornings and dad would dig up potatoes and carrots whilst I would pick the sprouts. There was no ride home for me as the barrow was now loaded up and the contents rushed home for Sunday dinner.

How fresh can you get?

We managed and were all well fed and healthy.

So the country now sits here almost totally dependent on imports.

Buy British - save air-miles.

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So when the politicians knock on your door this week, ask them who is to blame if you cannot feed your family properly this election time, just make it clear to them that without the eu, its rules and regulations, this country could grow what it wanted, it could fish where it liked, it could reduce our dependency on overseas food imports to a minimum, so that natural disasters such as this latest volcano ‘thing’ would have a minimum impact on families here.

My ‘hero’ Boris Johnson (London’s Lord Mayor) came out with a gem the other day.

He said "What crouton of substance did Clegg offer last Thursday, in the opaque minestrone of waffle?”

And what’s this?

“The Health Food Manufacturers’ Association released a report a couple of years ago saying that two thirds of Britons thought chips counted as a five-a-day vegetable.”

Is it not true?

For two years I've thought chips came from Potatoes?

Spoilt my day!

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The Cold Harsh Light of the eu!

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Well, they are forecasting a nice warm day here on Monday!

What could be better for the fairgrounds enthusiasts, those that save and restore items of our 'Fairground Heritage'.

The sounds, the smell and the wonderful sights of the carousels, swing-boats, stalls and steam engines.

Children just love all this movement and bright colourful lights.

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Well, if the dreaded eu have their 'kill-joy' ways, you can say 'goodbye' to the bright, colourful lights.

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"Traditional fairground rides such as merry-go-rounds, ghost trains and carousels are at risk of "losing their authenticity" because of the Brussels ban on light bulbs." Says the papers today.

However, officials at the Dingles Fairground Heritage Centre, which houses Britain's largest collection of classic rides, claim the new bulbs will not illuminate their machines.

The centre believes the rides used in parades, fairs and circuses for over 100 years will be plunged into darkness and will lose their ''authenticity''.

Guy Belshaw, spokesman for the Fairground Heritage Centre, said:

''The traditional incandescent bulbs give a soft glow that adds to the atmosphere and creates the ambiance of when the rides were at the peak of their popularity."

''It is extremely difficult to find bulbs domestically and the import supply has completely dried up."

The centre, in Lifton, Devon, boasts Victorian roundabouts, a 1940's ghost train and little-known novelty rides which use hundreds of coloured light bulbs each year.

The Fairground Heritage Trust says it has enough 110 volt lamps to last the next two years but will then run out.

Mr Belshaw said: ''We are really short of the coloured ones - we could lacquer them yellow and red but they do not always look the same. We are just hoping someone will have a supply somewhere.''

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Traditional fairground rides such as merry-go-rounds, ghost trains and carousels are at risk of "losing their authenticity" because of the Brussels ban on light bulbs.

The new bulbs give off a much more cold, harsh light the last thing you want at a fairground.

Why can't the eu just p*** off and leave our Fairgrounds alone?

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Leave my Toys Alone!

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OK, so all men are little boys at heart BUT......

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Henrik Alexandersson, a member of the Swedish Pirate Party, reports that the EU Directorate General for Justice, Freedom and Security is proposing a ban on the fuel used for children's toy steam engines in an effort to prevent terrorism.

Children's?.......Cheek.

He says that the Commission fears that a terrorist could buy tens of thousands of fuel tablets and then extract a sufficient amount of an explosive substance out of them to make a bomb.

These are the same as fire lighters and BBQ starters!

He went on to say that a ban would effectively be the end for the German manufactured steam engines, as no substitute fuel exists.

With open borders and unchecked immigration, there are more than likely tons of explosives already stored in the country. Besides the terrorists already have their copies of The Anarchists Cookbook to brew their own explosives.

If they are that worried about someone buying tens of thousands of fuel tablets then tell the shops not to sell tens of thousands of fuel tablets.

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Just p*** off and leave my Steam Roller alone!

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What's in a Name?

From the news.

"It appears that the only reason Peter Mandelson has not taken the title of ‘Deputy Prime Minister’ is because Harriet Harman would have resigned if he did, since that title was, much to her annoyance, denied to her."

So Peter is now the First Secretary of State and Lord President of the Council, the Baron Mandelson, of Foy in the county of Herefordshire and Hartlepool in the county of Durham.

Reminds me a bit of a character from Gilbert & Sullivan’s ’The Mikado’.

POOH-BAH. “It is consequently my degrading duty to serve this upstart as First Lord of the Treasury, Lord Chief Justice, Commander-in-Chief, Lord High Admiral, Master of the Buckhounds, Groom of the Back Stairs, Archbishop of Titipu and Lord Mayor, both acting and elect, all rolled into one!”

I think we could add a few more titles to ‘Mandelsnake’.

How about:-

First Lord Crony, First Lord Russian Advisor, Receiver of the Green Custard, First Lord Mortgage Advisor........

........ and any other Lord the Sub-prime Minister needs!

PS Sorry this blog is a bit late.....but Kipper was up a bit late......celebrating Kippers party doing so well last night.