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Hey Diddle Diddle, the cat did a piddle,
All over the kitchen floor.
The little dog laughed to see such fun,
So the cow did a little bit more!
Children just love 'naughty' words and I was no exception. In the playground at school all sorts rhymes, chants and skipping songs could be heard.
Another day I will do a post on skipping songs but today it's about the changing of the words to existing songs. The above nursery rhyme would be the earliest I could remember and brought many a titter from behind the bike shed.
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You can see what a 'cheeky chappy' I was from the above picture, taken in the 1940's...a new school uniform and all ready to go.
I have quite a number of conversions of Christmas carols, but here is a nice short one.
We thee kings from Birmingham are.
One in a taxi, one in a car.
One on a scooter, pippin his hooter,
Going from bar to bar !
As I got older , the songs became longer and during teenage years became much ruder.
Fear not....I will keep the worst one's away from this blog!
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My old man's a dustman, he wears a dustman's hat,
He took me round the corner, to see a football match.
The ball was in the centre, the rusty whistle blew,
Fatty passed to skinny, and down the wing he flew.
Skinny passed to fatty, fatty passed it back,
Skinny took a flying shot and knocked the goalie flat.
Where was the goalie when the ball was in the net?
Half way up the goalpost with his trousers round his neck.
They laid him on a stretcher, they laid him on a bed,
They rubbed his belly with cast iron jelly and this is what he said..
“Rule Britannia, marmalade and jam
Five chinese crackers up your backside….
Bang Bang Bang Bang Bang!“
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To the tune of 'I love a Lassie'
I love a sausage,
A bonnie, bonnie sausage
And I put it in the oven for my tea
I went down the cellar
To fetch my old umbrella
And the sausage ran after me!
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And two verses to the 'Girl I left behind me'
Oh the black cat piddled in the white cat's eye
And the white cat said "Cor Blimey!"
And the black cat said, "You silly sod,
You shouldn't stand behind me!"
The captain swore his bum was sore,
The first mate cried “Cor Blimey !”
And the man at the wheel
Said "Come and have a feel
Of the girl I left behind me!"
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And may I apologise to anyone if they have been offended.
I'm just saving a bit of my 'naughty' past!
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They remind me of when I was in my school choir and the lads used to start of singing songs with altered words whilst we were travelling too and from concerts.
ReplyDeleteYes I did that as well. I used to do that on church choir outings.
ReplyDeleteDidn't you girls join in? Or did you pretend not to like it? Or was it very rude?
The girls did join in, the words were more suggestive than rude.
ReplyDeleteThere was one in particular where the opening line was sung and someone else had to respond with a follow up line. The tune was very catchy and the song kept going on for ages with lots of people thinking up ideas for the response :-)
Can't recall the one you mean, although there were quite a lot similar ones where someone sings a verse followed by:-
ReplyDelete"That was a terrible song, sing us another one, just like the other one, sing us another one do!"
Actually I found a load of these on YouTube but didn't dare link to them from here.
Oh, weren't you a darling little boy! We used to sing "We three Beatles from Liverpool are,one in a taxi, one in a car, one on a scooter peeping his hooter, followed by Ringo Starr". Sorry if any Beatles fans are scandalised by this irreverence! Kath
ReplyDeleteBeatles Fans have a sense of humour, I think you will find Kath.
ReplyDelete