Laughter - A Wonderful Medicine

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I have quite a number of copies of music given away free by companies advertising their products. Many were included in newspapers or magazines. A hundred years ago nearly every front room had its piano and so a free song or two was most welcome.

However todays bit is not about 'freebies' but about parodies. Particularly those on carols.

There are, or were, literally dozens and I expect you all have your favourites.

They were all 'in jest' and I am sure were in no way meant to be disrespectful or offensive.

Here are a couple you may have not heard before.

This first one dates back to the First World War when the ‘in joke’ was:-

“What is the difference between Lord Kitchener and a Beechams Pill?”

“One sends you out to the front and the other sends you out to the back.”

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So it was either the Western Front or the Outside Loo!

Hark the jelly babies sing,

Beechams Pills are just the thing.

They are gentle, meek and mild,

Two for a man and one for a child.

If you want to go to heaven,

You must take the dose of seven!

If you want to go to hell,

Take the blinkin’ box as well!

If you want to go to hell,

Take the blinkin’ box as well!

This next one is from WW2..... at the time of the London Blitz.

It was a time when many songs were cleverly parodied…..here’s just two verses.

Good King Wenceslas looked out

On the Feast of Stephen.

When the sirens warbled out,

On note uneven:

Loudly roared the guns that night,

The barrage was a snorter;

When the warden came in sight,

Carrying sand and water.

“Hither stooge come stand by me

If you know your telling,

Have you got a stirrup pump

Handy in your dwelling?”

“Sire there’s sand out round the bend,

Higher than a mountain,

We can work the stirrup pump

From St. Agnes Fountain.”

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I leave you with this thought.......

Are Santa's helpers all subordinate clauses?

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