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What on earth is a "Christmas tingle"?
At first I thought it must be an electric shock from a faulty Christmas tree light.
No, it was a typo, they meant to say "Christlingle".
No, someone else chipped in...it's a "Christingle".
Oh well, however it's spelt, it's a new one on me. So I had to look it up.
It appears to be ..... an orange with a candle stuck in it, and lots of sweets on swizzle sticks poking out.
And the significance of the various bits is:-
Orange = the world
Red ribbon around - Christ's blood
4 sticks - compass points
Sweets or raisins - food provided by God
Candle (or Glow Stick!) - Light of Christ's love shining over the world.
And there was I, thinking that oranges were for eating.
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How about this for OTT . The ultimate in Christmas crackers.
From Harrods - 'Very Gold'. Luxury gifts include MP3 player, £599 for six.
From Highgrove - 'Luxury Red' - with truffles and silver decoration, £29.95 each.
I could go on, but enough of this trivia. Let's gets down to a couple of jokes for Foody to put in her home-made Crackers.
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A woman was driving up the M5 doing a legal 70mph in the centre lane, the only thing wrong was that she was knitting at the same time with her hands between the steering spokes!
A police car came up behind and saw what she was doing. On goes the blue light; they come along side; the policeman winds down his window and shouts to her…
“Pull over!”
“No,” she shouted back. “Pair of socks!”
.................
A lady goes into the local fishmonger.
“I’d like two fillets of plaice, please.” she said.
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“I’m sorry, madam, but we’ve sold out of plaice. How about cod?”
“OK, I’ll have two fillets of plaice.”
“I’m sorry, madam, but we’ve sold out of plaice. Why not try a nice wing of skate?“
“OK, I’ll have two fillets of plaice.”
This infuriated the fishmonger, who asked the customer, “If you take the C out of cod you get “od”. If you take the S out of skate you get “kate”. What do you get if you take the “Flip” out of plaice?”
The lady thought for a moment, then replied,
“But there ain’t no “Flip” in plaice.“
“That’s what I’ve been trying to tell you,” said the fishmonger.
Now there is a rude version of this on the web. It’s called the ‘Broccoli’ joke and it’s on a site called ‘oldjewstellingjokes.com’
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Here's one for Foody, from our festive lunch crackers last week. "What is a frogs favourite drink?"....."Croaka cola".... snigger..
ReplyDeleteThats for explaining all the different bits to the Christingle. I never knew what they meant.
ReplyDeleteNever heard of it before although I do know what a Kris Kringle is.Does that count?
ReplyDeleteLove the pullover joke, love the jokes that aren't hurtfut to anyone as long as you think knitters don't mind being thought obsessive!
Watch those stockings on the Aga! They might scorch!!!
Thanks Kath. Foody doesn't usually go online weekends but I expect she'll look in on Monday.
ReplyDeleteWell at least you had heard of them Cherie, which is more than I had.
I'm not alone then Liz! I guess the idea may have come the US perhaps?
I thought at first it may be a sexist joke and I was going to say "A person was driving.....".
Then it all sounds a bit silly.
I have no hair on my head. But as a true Englishman with a sense of humour, I am never offended by jokes about bald men.