Only Five Minutes More

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What the Ladies say and what they mean.

“Give me five minutes” really means half an hour if a woman is dressing.

Yet it means only two minutes if you’re if you’re watching a good programme on TV and your wife is waiting for help with something. (Could you come and open this jar for me?)

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“Nothing”... ironically this invariably means …something, especially when it’s the answer to you asking “What’s wrong?”

In the same way, “Fine”, when used by a woman to end an argument, seems anything but “fine“!

Arguments that begin with “Nothing” usually end with “Fine”!

But let's get back to the five minutes for getting dressed.

I have just read, and of course I don't believe everything I read, that......

.......Women will spend almost one year of their lives deciding what to wear.

A study (yes another one! ) found that choosing outfits for work, nights out, dinner parties, holidays, gym and other activities means the average female will spend 287 days rifling through their wardrobe.

Experts found on average women spend 16 minutes every weekday morning deciding what to wear and around 14 minutes on a Saturday or Sunday morning.

Experts!....who on earth are these experts?

A spokesman for clothes giant Matalan, which compiled the results after polling 2,491 women, said: "What you wear has a direct impact on how you feel about yourself and it is important a woman feels exceptional in her outfit.

"Whatever the occasion your clothes portray an image and we understand this is fundamentally important to women."

The study - which was based on an adult lifetime from the age of 16 to 60 - found most women will spend around 20 minutes deciding what to wear before hitting the town on a weekend night.

Week nights out can take up to 20 minutes a time too.

Deciding on what clothes to take on holiday uses up to 52 minutes each time.

While on holiday, ten minutes a morning will be taken up trying to find an acceptable outfit with another ten minutes spent picking evening clothes.

On top of that dinner parties, Christmas parties and black tie events - at around 36 minutes a time six times a year - adds up to three and a half days.

"Black tie events".....do they mean funerals?

The study also found on average women will try on two outfits each morning before coming to a final decision. And one in two women spend 15 minutes the night before work working out what to wear.

As I said earlier, I don't always believe what I read in papers.

And to finish.....

"The girls that are wanted are girls of sense

Whom fashions can never deceive;

Who can follow whatever is pretty,

And dare what is silly to leave.

The girls that are wanted are careful girls

Who count what a thing will cost,

Who use with a prudent, generous hand,

But see that nothing is lost."

Found in an old autograph book.

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